and with or without it, i’m good enough...

maybe i’ve done enough,
and your golden child grew up.
maybe this trophy isn’t real love-
and with or without it, i’m good enough.

maybe i’ve done enough,
finally catching up.
for the first time i see an image of
my brokenness utterly worthy of love.
maybe i’ve done enough.

i finally see myself.
through the eyes of no one else.
it’s so exhausting on this silver screen
where i play the role of anyone but me.

i finally see myself.
unabridged and overwhelmed,
a mess of a story i’m ashamed to tell,
but i’m slowly learning how to break this spell.
and i finally see myself.

now i only want what’s real-
to let my heart feel what it feels.
gold, silver or bronze hold no value here,
where work and rest are equally revered.

i only want what’s real-
i set aside the highlight reel,
and leave my greatest failures on display*

(*worthy of love anyway)

Three, Sleeping at Last

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